You dumb clucks! Never have we seen any people as outright stupid as you collectively are. You all are so dumb and ignorant, that you don’t know how to teach your kids! Admittedly, you have taught them how to talk, walk, eat, drink, think, relieve themselves in the proper place, bathe, dress, know colors, and 98% of everything they’ll ever know probably, but you parents are so idiotic, that we’ll have to teach your kids the remaining few percentages. We’re going to start a public school system, which we will force all your kids to attend, and you’ll pay for them with taxes on your property. You don’t have any kids needing educating? Tough. The schools we create won’t do much teaching anyway, but you are forced to send them. Everyone pays taxes on their property from now on, including railroads on their rights of way. No one escapes except churches and a few other charities.. After all, if you’re so stupid as not be able to teach your kids anything, in our opinion anyway, we’ll have government force education on those poor, unfortunate children, who are just crying for our type of education, which you are far too stupid to give them.
You dumb clucks! Never have we seen any people as outright stupid as you collectively are! Admittedly, you have managed to live, eat, work, earn livings, be parents, vote, drive, play tennis and other games, swim, go to church, read books, think, maintain and buy your home, pay your bills, go to theatres, concerts, and baseball games. You have managed to keep yourself healthy, bathe daily, and wear clean clothes. You have managed to fall in love, marry, have children, and perform all of life’s necessities, but you are so, so, so dumb and ignorant, that you don’t know how to save for the future. We therefore, are going to force you to save for your old age, by deducting money from your pay checks. We’ll put it aside in a special account, where it will be un-touchable. We won’t do that, but we’ll put your money in the general fund and put our IOU’s in place of the dollars we force you to ’contribute.’ When you get old and retire, you can therefore have enough money to live comfortably, assuming there’s anything left in what we call the ’trust fund.’
You dumb clucks! You haven’t enough sense to buy food for yourselves. You are starving because of your ignorance. We’re going to start a food stamp program to save you from starving. You are so utterly stupid, than you can’t even feed yourselves! The taxpayers will feed you, so don’t worry. You won’t starve any more.
You dumb clucks! You are so stupid that you can’t even house yourselves! You’re living on the street, freezing to death, and you might catch pneumonia. We’ll build housing for you, so you can have a place to live. Taxpayers will pay for it, so don’t worry.
You dumb clucks! You can’t even keep healthy! While you may know enough to sleep at night, go to the drug store for remedies when you get sick, work for a living, buy a home, take vacations, raise children, get haircuts, buy clothing, read books, watch TV or listen to the radio, shift gears on a car or truck, you are simply too damned stupid to care for your own health! We’ll take care of it for you with Medicare, and the taxpayers will pay for it, so don’t worry.
You dumb clucks! When you go to work, you can’t even be safe on the job! While you have a lot of skills, doing your work, you are always falling down, cutting yourself, or doing stupid things. We’ll take care of that by having government be sure that you are safe. If you aren’t, we’ll fine the bejesus out of you or your boss to teach him a lesson. Hey you! That sawdust on the floor. Get it up and buy an expensive vacuum system to get it up, or we’ll fine you, We have to make you safe, because you don’t know how to be safe on your own., Don’t worry, your boss or the taxpayers will pay for it. Your boss is closing down the plant because of the regulations? Too bad, but at least you were safe for a little while.
You dumb clucks! You can’t keep safe behind the wheel even. You’re always crashing into other cars, having accidents, and injuring yourselves and others. We’ll fix that. All cars will have seat belts and air bags. We’ll prohibit any pointed parts of cars which might impale you. We’ll make you safe and fine you if you don’t use the seat belts. We’ll force car manufacturers to install all this safety stuff. It may cost several thousand dollars per car, which may discourage buyers., but you’ll be safe. We’ll make a lot of money, having police check to see if you’re wearing our forced seat belts, and fine you if you aren’t. We’re going to force all you motorcycle owners to wear those vision limiting helmets too, and we’ll fine you if you don’t. Someone’s got to protect you, because you’re too stupid to care for yourself. I know, you know how to drive, shift gears, ride a motorcycle, read signs, know left from right, up from down, turn on headlights at night, and check to see if you have gas and oil, but you’re far too stupid to care for your own safety. We’ll see to it that you are safe by our standards, and you’ll pay for it and be fined if you don’t agree.
You businessmen and corporate CEO’s. You are as dumb as a box of rocks! You make a profit of course, but you may just be too stupid to run your business or corporation correctly, in our eyes anyway, so we will grant ourselves the power to shut you down if we think you are making a mistake.
This can go on and on, and what has it gotten us? Huge oppressive government, huge, oppressive taxes, bureaucrats and regulations everywhere, a dumbed down population, ruined cities, a lazy, worthless, crime committing, underclass, which burns what it finds fun to burn, urinates down the elevator shafts of the apartments you built for them, and sprays graffiti everywhere. An underclass which abandons cars, homes, stores, and neighborhoods, when they have finished destroying them. A public school system which cost huge amounts of taxpayer dollars, and as each year passes, educates less and less, with education completely missing in poorer neighborhoods. America was far better educated before public schools. Everything is taxed to the hilt, and it still isn’t nearly enough, so the balance is borrowed and printed, thereby ruining the currency. Jobs go overseas, factories are empty and arsoned, and the actual unemployment is close to 20%. Where is there to work? What do we make any longer? Everyone can’t do everyone else’s laundry or serve them hamburgers.
In a previous column, I said that “The more government we have, the less freedom we have,” and this is totally true. But what also might be added is that also the poorer we are, the stupider we are, and the unhappier we are, when government grows out of control, as it has for the last 77 years. Think about the former glorious America. America, with small government, unobtrusive government, stable dollars, exporting everything, and importing little, full employment making what we consume, growing what we eat, and being self sufficient in oil. Try to remember an America with little debt, few bureaucracies, small taxes, and little interference in our lives. Picture a strong America, which cared for itself with no help, saved for its old age with no forced savings, children had their educations finished at home, and we went to the doctor when we needed to, and paid for it. Picture an America with no slums, abandoned homes and cars littering former wonderful neighborhoods. Can we bring it back? The Tea Party movement may be a glimmer of hope, and we must grab on to anything that might save us.
P.S. The Tea arty Express I went to yesterday, was glorious! Three huge busses, a stage show, and lots of great patriotism! Go to one. You’ll love it!
To be truly ’saved,’ we should go back 77 years, when there was no welfare, public housing, food stamps, Social Security, Medicare, food stamps, and endless bureaucracies. We must go back to no underclass, beautiful cities, operating factories, full employment, and a stable dollar. Stuff to dream of! It’ll never happen of course, but maybe we can salvage something.